[ Sasuke...? The admission surprises her—she can't imagine the Sasuke she knows as the type of person who would threaten to kill his best friend and destroy an entire village. She can't imagine the Naruto and Sasuke she knows as enemies who would go so far as to kill each other.
It makes her... sad. Now that she's experienced the anguish of opposing the people she loves firsthand, her heart feels sick for Naruto—and Sasuke too—knowing that they've experienced the same. She can only hope that Sasuke's presence here, older and kinder, means that the both of them didn't have to die. She can only hope...
He can't see it, but there's a soft rustling on her end of the call as she draws her knees up to her chest and wraps her arms around her legs. She's quiet for a while, letting his words sink into her and settle. There's truth in them—the only truth, she realizes, that she can really cling to when the world is much grayer than she'd thought.
Finally, in a small voice: ]
Even if it feels right... do you ever get scared?
[ Everyone she knows is always so brave—her siblings, her retainers, the soldiers in their army—but she's... not. There's a terrifying difference between a heart without regret and a heart at peace. Maybe... ]
[Maybe impossibly, the question makes Naruto smile.
His gaze wanders over his empty room- the made beds and his shoes, flung haphazardly around the floor, a stack of dirty dishes beside his mattress. In a way, this kind of lived-in messiness reminds him of home. Of the days he'd drag himself to bed with bone deep exhaustion to go sprinting out again early the next morning, or when he'd be shoveling instant ramen into his mouth while trying to stay awake to finish reading one more scroll.]
I get scared all the time. Actually, I cry alot too.
[He doesn't sound embarrassed to admit it, but that's largely owed to circumstance and to Hime-chan herself. They're new friends, but they've done nothing but encourage one another and in their own ways, confide. It isn't as simple as seeing her as someone he wants to protect- because hearing her speak reminds him of the promises he'd made himself a long time ago. She reminds him of the person he's trying to be- a little stronger and a little braver every day.]
But I think that's okay because I don't know anybody who doesn't get scared about the things that are special to them. It's because they're your most important people, right?
[ It's hard for her to imagine that someone as strong as Naruto (she remembers how he acted on the train, how brave and capable he was) could feel the same way that she does. But when he says it like that he makes it sound so... natural. She can hear the smile in his voice too, the reassurance and understanding, and that—she doesn't understand. She doesn't understand how he takes his fear and weakness, the same parts of herself that she tries so hard to hide and suppress, and turns them into his strength. She doesn't understand how he's so unafraid to feel afraid.
But she admires him for it anyway. She's a little envious too, especially of how he wears his heart so openly on his sleeve while she tries to keep it guarded inside her chest. ]
I hadn't thought about it that way... [ Important people, huh? She's scared of a lot of things, but her worst fears always revolve around those important people, like he said. Maybe he's right... ]
I-I wasn't expecting you to say that. You're so b-brave... like my siblings. [ And not like her. ]
It isn't a mean sound, or even an entirely surprised one. It's just warm and a little startled- after all, she's just given him a pretty big compliment. Naruto doesn't really think of himself in terms of bravery or acts of heroism. He's just a determined guy who isn't willing to give up on his dreams- his or anyone else's.]
Everybody gets scared sometimes! I think maybe I'm braver now than I was when I was a kid [Just like that the memory bubbles to the surface, Sasuke looking smugly back at him. Are you hurt, scaredy-cat?] but I don't know anybody who starts out that way.
We're able to become strong because we have people that're special to us. 'Cause we have bonds that we wanna protect.
[ There's something infectious about his laugh—something that draws out a smile from her, that makes her feel a little lighter. She feels a little relieved too, his reassurance lighting a spark of hope inside her. That's exactly why she's working so hard, isn't it? It's like she's been walking the path to change with her head down, focused on her feet underneath her, and now he's holding her head up, fingers underneath her chin, so she can see everything ahead of her.
Change doesn't have to happen overnight. She may not be as strong and brave as she wants to be right now, but the future is a different story.
Naruto is... he's unexpectedly insightful, isn't he? ]
That's why I want to become stronger... I-I want my siblings to be able to rely on me. They've always protected me, so...
[ She almost adds, as a habit: Does that sound silly? but Naruto has never once found anything she's said silly. It gives her a little more courage to add: ] I-I hope you can rely on me more too.
If that's what you wanna get stronger for, then I definitely believe you can do it.
[He means it with all sincerity- not because he's trying to make her feel better, or not because he's trying to encourage her; Naruto says it because he knows first hand what real motivation looks like. She talks about her siblings, and about what it means to want to stand up for someone that's always protected her. He thinks of Sakura-chan first, and what it had been like to watch her back. And then he thinks of Hinata fighting Pein, knowing that she would lose and unwilling to abandon him.]
So I'm gonna try too. Then we can rely on each other.
[ His encouragement makes her feel... warm, her motivation bolstered even higher. Even if she doubts herself, he still believes that she can do it... and she has to try if she doesn't want to let him (or herself) down. She has so many people she wants to make proud—her siblings, her retainers, and now Naruto too.
He can't see the smile that stretches across her face, but she does laugh softly. ]
Heehee, I can already rely on you. [ Hasn't she been doing that this whole time? ]
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no subject
It makes her... sad. Now that she's experienced the anguish of opposing the people she loves firsthand, her heart feels sick for Naruto—and Sasuke too—knowing that they've experienced the same. She can only hope that Sasuke's presence here, older and kinder, means that the both of them didn't have to die. She can only hope...
He can't see it, but there's a soft rustling on her end of the call as she draws her knees up to her chest and wraps her arms around her legs. She's quiet for a while, letting his words sink into her and settle. There's truth in them—the only truth, she realizes, that she can really cling to when the world is much grayer than she'd thought.
Finally, in a small voice: ]
Even if it feels right... do you ever get scared?
[ Everyone she knows is always so brave—her siblings, her retainers, the soldiers in their army—but she's... not. There's a terrifying difference between a heart without regret and a heart at peace. Maybe... ]
no subject
His gaze wanders over his empty room- the made beds and his shoes, flung haphazardly around the floor, a stack of dirty dishes beside his mattress. In a way, this kind of lived-in messiness reminds him of home. Of the days he'd drag himself to bed with bone deep exhaustion to go sprinting out again early the next morning, or when he'd be shoveling instant ramen into his mouth while trying to stay awake to finish reading one more scroll.]
I get scared all the time. Actually, I cry alot too.
[He doesn't sound embarrassed to admit it, but that's largely owed to circumstance and to Hime-chan herself. They're new friends, but they've done nothing but encourage one another and in their own ways, confide. It isn't as simple as seeing her as someone he wants to protect- because hearing her speak reminds him of the promises he'd made himself a long time ago. She reminds him of the person he's trying to be- a little stronger and a little braver every day.]
But I think that's okay because I don't know anybody who doesn't get scared about the things that are special to them. It's because they're your most important people, right?
no subject
[ It's hard for her to imagine that someone as strong as Naruto (she remembers how he acted on the train, how brave and capable he was) could feel the same way that she does. But when he says it like that he makes it sound so... natural. She can hear the smile in his voice too, the reassurance and understanding, and that—she doesn't understand. She doesn't understand how he takes his fear and weakness, the same parts of herself that she tries so hard to hide and suppress, and turns them into his strength. She doesn't understand how he's so unafraid to feel afraid.
But she admires him for it anyway. She's a little envious too, especially of how he wears his heart so openly on his sleeve while she tries to keep it guarded inside her chest. ]
I hadn't thought about it that way... [ Important people, huh? She's scared of a lot of things, but her worst fears always revolve around those important people, like he said. Maybe he's right... ]
I-I wasn't expecting you to say that. You're so b-brave... like my siblings. [ And not like her. ]
no subject
It isn't a mean sound, or even an entirely surprised one. It's just warm and a little startled- after all, she's just given him a pretty big compliment. Naruto doesn't really think of himself in terms of bravery or acts of heroism. He's just a determined guy who isn't willing to give up on his dreams- his or anyone else's.]
Everybody gets scared sometimes! I think maybe I'm braver now than I was when I was a kid [Just like that the memory bubbles to the surface, Sasuke looking smugly back at him. Are you hurt, scaredy-cat?] but I don't know anybody who starts out that way.
We're able to become strong because we have people that're special to us. 'Cause we have bonds that we wanna protect.
no subject
Change doesn't have to happen overnight. She may not be as strong and brave as she wants to be right now, but the future is a different story.
Naruto is... he's unexpectedly insightful, isn't he? ]
That's why I want to become stronger... I-I want my siblings to be able to rely on me. They've always protected me, so...
[ She almost adds, as a habit: Does that sound silly? but Naruto has never once found anything she's said silly. It gives her a little more courage to add: ] I-I hope you can rely on me more too.
no subject
[He means it with all sincerity- not because he's trying to make her feel better, or not because he's trying to encourage her; Naruto says it because he knows first hand what real motivation looks like. She talks about her siblings, and about what it means to want to stand up for someone that's always protected her. He thinks of Sakura-chan first, and what it had been like to watch her back. And then he thinks of Hinata fighting Pein, knowing that she would lose and unwilling to abandon him.]
So I'm gonna try too. Then we can rely on each other.
no subject
He can't see the smile that stretches across her face, but she does laugh softly. ]
Heehee, I can already rely on you. [ Hasn't she been doing that this whole time? ]